Are you unworthy of Love?

If you are not getting what you want, you are out of harmony with what you say that you want.

You may say you want love but inside do you think or have thoughts that you don't deserve love or do you feel unworthy?
Do you see love or people in love and feel hatred and jealousy towards them?
I admit that even I used to look at other happy couples with hated. I remember walking my dog on the beach back in my single days and everywhere I looked I would see these couples holding hands and it would seriously piss me off that they were so damn happy and that I wasn’t.
Here I was, a single mum with 4 children and I was really starting to think that no one would want me because I had children and after a string of relationships that didn’t work out I seriously started to question, “what’s wrong with me?” I used to think I had some pretty good qualities and I thought I saw myself as wife material but after a few failed dates, failed relationships and a failed marriage, it all left me wondering that something has to be wrong with me.
Now when I look back I can see it’s because I didn’t know exactly what I wanted in a partner plus I was looking for a certain age and look. Funnily enough I wanted someone with no children at all as my previous partner very openly favoured his child and my children could see this.

So here’s my little story about how I met the man of my dreams, the perfect man for me
So after a few dates and seeing a couple of different guys an acquaintance told me in these exact words “Bridget, you have to stop being so fussy, you find something wrong with them all. Maybe you’ll just have to settle for the next one that comes along” With which I strongly disagreed and told her that I will never settle.
In that moment I just had this knowingness that I will find someone that is perfect for me, that loves my children as his own, that has his head screwed on, knows where he is going in life and treats me like an absolute queen that I deserve! In that moment something just clicked, I just knew that somewhere is the perfect man for me and for my life and when time is right he would come into my life.

Within a couple of days I came across a Louise Hay You Tube clip and learnt of an affirmation 'I am loved and I radiate love’ and I repeatedly thought it too myself the whole day, every day and every time that I thought of it. Within a couple of days I realised that I was being more loving towards my children and giving them way more random hugs than I usually do and that they were so much better behaved and helpful and loving. I then realised I started seeing signs of love and happy couples holding hands. Only now I was genuinely feeling happy for them and smiling to myself. This one affirmation changed everything.

Here’s the trick, don't look for your “ideal” partner, you are only looking for signs of love and suddenly as if by magic you will see love everywhere, such as......
Happy couples walking and kissing. "Feel" and be happy for them and know that now you are able to "see" love that you are so close to the universe to bringing yours to you. Random couple birds flying. Love heart pictures everywhere or heart shape clouds. I saw hearts and Love everywhere once I was open and wanting to see it. Now follow your instincts and your gut feelings. Also take this into consideration:
• Dress everyday like you could meet your future partner, look the part, smell the part. An acquaintance would tell me he wants love and is sick of being lonely while we went out for breakfast yet he sits with us which he looks unshaven for near on 2 weeks and visually looks and comes across unimpressed at life. Plus wearing scruffy clothes! How is that going to find you the partner of your dreams?
• Be the person you want to attract. Would you look twice at someone who walks out of house not brushing their hair and dressed all scruffy? No you wouldn't would you, dress to impress at the same level that you would expect of your ideal or potential partner.

Now here’s my favourite part to the story
Literally only 2 weeks after that conversation with my apparent friend telling me I should settle and only 2 weeks of repeating over and over to myself “ I am loved and radiate love” I had this random thought one night. I had this thought to jump into Tinder a dating site which my first thought was 'hell no'. Luckily I was quick to realise to follow the inspired thought. I have to admit it was the next night I signed up as the idea initially terrified me.
So very bravely I signed up and I wrote down exactly what I wanted and exactly who I am and I put down emojis for everything that I could think of. I figured that in real life I’m cheeky and playful in general so why not put that honesty in emoji form on my Tinder profile, and that’s what I did. I emoji’d that I have kids, that I’m a career business woman, that I run, lift weights and I even put on that I am looking for , emoji wedding chapel. Yes I did (emoji laugh cry face here). I figured this Tinder profile will make 99% of men run for their life but the one man I’m looking for will love it.

Literally the next day I had a Superlike and we were chatting by that night- online texting that evening. So in conversation we were chatting about what we were up to the next day and it turned out that we were both going to gym in my the morning. And naturally you ask, ‘ohh what gym do you go too?’ It turned out that we went to the exact same gym! Yes the exact same gym, and we had been going to the exact same gym for over a year and we had never bumped into each other as I went at approx. 5am -6 am and he would arrive for around 6 am as I was leaving. It also turned out that we always went to the same café, walked our dogs in the same area on the foreshore but we had never bumped into each other.
So anyhow we arranged to say hi at the gym that very next morning, ended up having coffee that day.
Within a month we were pretty much living together full time, at two months we got a new house together to start fresh. All from following my inner feeling/thought to try Tinder, which I thought was just a hook up site- it turns out not always lol

What I find amusing is that this guy was nothing that I was looking for and the hilarious part, considering I was looking for someone with no children, he actually came with 5 children. So here we are, now two years on with a lovely big blended family of 9 children, which I must add get on famously. Its funny how the universe works. I can honestly say that he is my best friend. I never thought I would find someone who is so compatible, I didn’t even think that what we have was even possible. So have trust that what you need, not what you want, will find you at the right time, once you learn to love ‘love’ and to trust your instincts and those inner feelings or ideas.

Also something else I feel I need to add in here. I have everything I want in a partner. And I believe that you too, by using this basic affirmation can find also find love, actually that was the easy part, however now that I have everything that I wanted I find myself sometimes self-sabotaging which is caused from inner feelings of not feeling like I deserve all that I have.

Please be aware of your self-sabotaging efforts. Luckily for me my partner can see and is aware of when I self-sabotage and is so incredibly patient with me. So remind yourself daily that you are deserving
I guess relationships and worthiness are similar to the shower quote of “People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing. That’s why we recommend it daily”. So in this same instance, once you have your amazing relationship please remember to find daily gratitude and work on your worthiness so you keep your happiness.
Work on your worthiness daily.
You are worthy and you are deserving

So to summarise, repeat daily and all day to yourself;
“I am loved and radiate love” and “ I love and approve of myself”

Ohh and take him on date nights as well, show your man how much you appreciate him, men love to feel appreciated 😊